Are you ready for this?

Women don't really want men to impress us. What we really like is for men to be impressed by us.

Acceptance

I wrote a post of encouragement on the Tango-L mailing list to a man who voiced his frustrations about finding the right way to lead. Acceptance is such a very large part of dancing tango. It's one of those tango lessons that transfers right back to life.

You know, A., it just really isn't easy, so forgive yourself.
You're going to be fine. You're trying so very hard, and that means
the answers will come. Meanwhile, friendship counts for a lot. Your
partners notice and appreciate that you're sincere and considerate.
They like that. I know you want to be a good dancer, and I'm sure
you're on your way so I'm not telling you to settle for less. But
honestly, women who have been around a while are very thankful just to
dance with someone who cares.

For a while, the hardest women to dance with will be the intermediate
dancers who are just as ambitious as you are and wishing they could be
dancing all the time with the "great" dancers. You, too, will find
just how much friendship matters, and years from now you'll still be
dancing with the ones who were kind to you when you were starting out.
Somehow, it won't matter to you if they never really became such great
dancers. You'll be dancing with them just because of who they are and
how you feel about them.

Then tango will be taking care of your soul instead of the other way
around. That's tango for the long haul.

Eventually your most serious efforts will become a private matter and
you won't keep apologizing out loud for where you are and what you
think you might have flubbed. It isn't arrogance, it's acceptance.
You're allowed to accept yourself while continuing to strive to be
better. People like being around someone who accepts himself. It's
less work. Once you accept yourself, you'll also discover something
else very magical, that you even have the power to accept other
people, too, and wow do they ever like that! You'll have hundreds of
partners beating a path to dance with you and you won't even be
trying.

Have a great time!